Too much Anger, Too many Arguments

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After you have won your battle with the problem of making excuses, let’s now move on to the next battle front where one more potential enemy is waiting to be conquered by you. This enemy is the one who can take control of our minds for a short duration of time and then make us say and do the worst type of things which we may regret later on and which can cause so much damage to us and sometimes this damage can be irreversible in nature. Yes, we are talking about the problem of too much anger. The habit of having too much anger is a problem which can spoil even the best of the things achieved by you and which at times, can make others ignore even the best qualities in you and leave you. Hence if you have this problem of excessive anger, you will need to get rid of it in order to make yourself a better person and in order to achieve more and more good things in your life and most importantly, in order to retain whatever good things or good people you have already achieved in your life. This is because the worst type of damage done by anger is that it can snatch even the most valuable and the dearest people or achievements from you.

It should be noted that a certain amount of anger or aggression is a must needed quality if we want to achieve big things in our lives and without anger or aggression; nothing great or even big can be achieved in most cases. Hence anger or aggression is not a bad thing in itself but not knowing how to channelize such anger or aggression is the problem. Even the problem of getting too angry is not the one which will stop you from achieving big or very big things in your life, though it has a strong tendency to take those things and especially people, away from you. For this reason, learning to control your anger becomes very important as you won’t want to let go of the things or people in which you have invested so much of your effort, time and care. In order to treat this problem of excessive anger, let’s try to find the root cause of this problem and then start dealing with it from that root itself.

Not all people are born equal in terms of their physical and mental compositions and accordingly there are some people who in comparison to an average person, are gifted with much more physical or mental energy, whether this energy is positive or negative. As the amount of energy running through their bodies or minds is much more than an average person, it is easy to understand that these people need more and more ways to find an exit for this energy or find more and more jobs to utilize this energy. By virtue of their past life karmas as well as by virtue of their present life karmas and efforts, some of these people find proper directions to channelize this energy and these are the people who are seen achieving big or very big things in various spheres of life as they have much more energy to perform and accordingly they have better chances of achieving more and more.

On the other hand, some of these people once again due to their past life karmas as well as their present life karmas and efforts; don’t get due chances or opportunities to put this energy to a constructive use. As a result, the unused amount of energy keeps increasing with time and when this energy is unable to be contained anymore, it comes out in the form of bursts of anger, just like a volcano pours out tons and tons of lava which has been building inside it for a long time and which is unable to be contained now, by this volcano. Hence this problem of excessive anger comes from having more physical or mental energy than an average person and then not finding proper ways to channelize this excessive energy.

The problem of excessive anger is further divided into two categories and these classifications depend on whether you are suffering from excessive physical energy or from excessive mental energy. Even though the resultant is excessive anger in both the cases, but the expression of this anger is different depending on whether such anger has been caused by excessive physical energy or by excessive mental energy.  If you are confused how these different energies should be identified, let me help you with this and tell you how to identify these two different types of energies.

Pay attention to this fact that the people getting angry due to excessive physical energy often express their anger in the form of physical activities like fighting with other people, throwing things around, hitting other people or things or even hitting themselves whereas the people getting angry due to excessive mental energy often express their anger in the form of too many arguments, heated arguments, verbal fights, emotional dramas and all other such type of violent or aggressive activities which exist on mental plane and which don’t contain physical violence, in most cases.

Hence in order to treat this problem effectively, you will need to learn ways to channelize this energy in proper direction and at the same time you will need to limit your engagement in certain specific types of activities which may increase this problem as such activities are likely to bring more energy to your body or they can act as a catalyst and provoke your energy to come out in the form of anger.

To treat this problem in the most effective manner, you will first need to identify whether you are suffering from excessive physical energy or from excessive mental energy or from both of them and accordingly you will choose the activities which will help you get rid of this problem or reduce it as much as possible. For example, if you are suffering from excessive physical energy, find physical ways to release this energy and start engaging in them. Doing hard and demanding physical activities is one of the best ways to release this energy and reduce this problem. Therefore, you can choose to engage in activities like running, mountain climbing, cycling, playing football, playing tennis, swimming and many other physical activities which give you opportunities to release this physical energy. Care should be taken that you should only choose to engage in those physical activities which you find yourself the most comfortable with.

Make sure that you don’t engage in any type of physical activity which builds more and more muscle in your body. To be specific, people suffering from this problem should avoid doing much weight training as such training may increase the intensity of their problem. This is because, when you engage in weight training and you start building more and more muscle, more and more physical energy is stored in your body, in the form of this muscle that your body is gaining. As you are having more and more physical energy available now, you will need to find more and more ways to release this extra energy and since you are already suffering from excessive physical energy, inviting more physical energy to your body is exactly what you should not do.

Take a look at the other sports or physical activities suggested by me and you will find that almost in all of these activities, you don’t build much new muscle in your body and hence you don’t invite more energy in your body. Though you will certainly gain some muscle in each one of these activities but that muscle is nothing in comparison to the amount of muscle you gain when you engage in serious gym training. Gaining more and more muscle is likely to aggravate the problem in this case since muscle is nothing but energy and that is why you feel it flexing and active in your body since it is very difficult for energy to remain silent or inactive. Hence you should avoid doing gym training or any other such physical activities which can make you gain much muscle or so to say, which can bring in more and more energy to your body.

However, if you are a diehard fan of weight training and you feel very comfortable with the gym, you can simply mark some boundaries for your gym training which means that you should plan your gym training in a way that you don’t gain muscle beyond a certain point and that point should not be set to the level of a person who has biceps of 17 inches or even more. So keep that mark at a reasonable physical size.

Moving on to activities which  can help people suffering from excessive mental energy, start engaging in mental activities which help you release excessive mental energy and you will start feeling better and relaxed. For example, If you suffer from excessive mental energy, start engaging in activities like writing poetry, songs, articles or books; painting, singing, acting, dancing, giving advice to other people, motivating others, crossword puzzles or other puzzles, video games, computer games and other types of games which require mental effort and you will be able to release excess mental energy. Engage in a mental activity that you enjoy most as that will relax you sooner and help you get rid of the excessive energy at the earliest.

A strong word of caution is compulsory here. Since we are directly dealing with excess energy, our actions should be precise. Hence in order to effectively deal with excessive mental energy, don’t engage much in activities like reading many books, particularly the books which offer you more and more knowledge and instead stick to books on self development, comics or comedy writings, and light books. Don’t watch too much television, especially daily soaps which are full of drama and emotion and instead watch comedy and music shows, inspirational movies and similar stuff.

It may seem surprising how learning can be harmful for someone when it is projected as one of the best things in this world, but this fact strongly holds its grounds and here is how. The people suffering from excessive mental energy already have excessive amount of energy in their minds and they don’t have sufficient outlets for this energy. You should also understand that when it comes to the domain of your mind, mental energy is released each time you put a thought into words or each time you do something creative which requires mental energy. On the other hand, more and more mental energy comes to you when you are not releasing mental energy but gaining it through activities like learning, watching drama type shows and other such activities where no mental energy is going out of your mind and more mental energy is getting into your mind through these activities where you are not a transmitter but you are a receiver.

This causes the same type of problem as building more and more muscle causes in case of people suffering from excessive physical energy. By engaging in more and more mental activities which offer inward transfer of mental energy from various sources to your mind, you are gaining more and more mental energy through these activities and since you are already suffering from excessive mental energy, this extra energy is only going to increase your problems. Hence you should avoid engaging in such practices and instead you should start engaging in mental activities where the flow of energy is outwards which means you are releasing your mental energy and others are receiving it.

Always remember that there is a proper place for everything and too much of anything can be harmful for you, even though it may be one of the best things like learning. For this reason only, even fears can be used for positive results whereas positive things like learning can also cause harm. This is why I have mentioned again and again in this book that you should not try all those general guidelines available all around, and instead you should first find out what exactly works for you and then start doing it.

It is an interesting observation that among the people who argue a lot due to this problem of excessive energy, those people will certainly argue for a longer periods of time as well as argue more often, who have more knowledge regarding various spheres of life, nature, universe and all other such things, compared to the people who have less knowledge. This is due to the reason that with more and more learning comes more and more knowledge, and the more knowledge you have the more fuel you have to keep the fire burning, which in this case is the fire of arguments. Since you now have more knowledge, you are able to give more and more logics or examples in favor of your arguments and accordingly you tend to engage in more and more arguments as you know that your chances of winning such arguments are better.

Hence if you are suffering from this problem of excessive mental energy, you should engage in selective learning only, which means that you should learn only those things or topics which are either required for your job profile or for some other job, task or practice that you are doing. At the same time, you should engage in activities which require mental energy to be released from your end. As more and more of this energy is released, you start feeling relaxed.

So engage in selective learning only, until you have reached a point where you have sufficient number of outlets for the release of this excessive mental energy. This is when you can start learning again, with the condition that you will keep releasing this extra energy in one way or the other.

You may be surprised to know that most of the creative things you see in this world are created by the people having excessive mental energy though they are not suffering from it since they have found proper ways to release and use this increased amount of mental energy which they have been gifted with. So having extra physical or extra mental energy is basically a good thing if you find proper use for this extra energy whereas it can trouble you a lot if you don’t find ways to release it and put this energy to some constructive or creative purposes.

Some of you may wonder why should activities like dancing and watching TV programs like comedy shows or musical programs help the person suffering from excessive mental energy as dancing looks like a physical activity and TV shows are obviously sending more and more mental energy to us which is supposed to worsen this problem and not treat it. Well as far as dancing is concerned, even though it requires a lot of physical effort, but it is primarily a creative activity as you imagine and create new steps. Dancing demands much mental energy and so, you find a release of mental energy through it.

As far as some specific types of videos are concerned, comedy shows or comedy movies don’t send knowledge or argumentative energy into you as most of them don’t offer any logic. Most of you will agree that most comedy shows or movies are only good to laugh at and enjoy, and most of them don’t have any logic. All they do is make you laugh and this is what does the trick. Such energy sends a signal to your subconscious mind, saying that logic and reason are not everything and that you can be happy even without logic and reason. As this message is sent to your subconscious mind again and again, it starts telling you not to bother about the exact logic or reason all the time and sometimes, you should just enjoy what others say or do without bothering much about whether they are right or wrong, when seen through the eyes of logic and reasoning.

As you develop this tendency more and more, you tend to argue less and less with people since the primary reason for your argument with others is that they don’t have correct logic or that their logic is not as good as yours is. As you start caring less about logic and you tend to enjoy more even if there is little logic or no logic, your tendency to argue is reduced. Apart from this, the type of relaxation these comedy shows produce through laughter, such energy always helps balancing out some of your negative energy which is there in the form of excessive mental energy and accordingly these shows help you become better. This is why comedy shows or comedy movies are useful and sometimes even more useful than the shows or movies which offer us more and more knowledge where the latter may not be good if you suffer from excessive mental energy.

Musical programs, music videos or just plain music have similar effects on your mind. They tend to counteract negative energy, though they are not as effective as comedy shows are. Drama shows and daily soaps are the worst kind of activities one can engage in, as most of these drama shows are full of negativity – scheming, plotting, cheating and other negative activities. Accordingly, these shows send more and more negative energy to your mind which is already suffering from excessive mental energy and hence, your problem intensifies. Therefore you should stay away from such mental activities that send energy to your mind instead of taking energy out of your mind, particularly if these activities are sending negative energy to your mind, which is the last thing you want in this scenario.

As you start engaging in more and more activities demanding the release of more and more physical or mental energy depending on the type of excessive energy you may have, you will start seeing relief because as this extra energy finds constructive outlets, it stops bothering you. Once you have got rid of this problem, you are ready to move onto the next problem.


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To be Continued

Lord Shiva Bless You

Himanshu Shangari