Too Many Fears, Lack of Confidence 01

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After you have successfully treated your habit of negative attitude, the next big obstacle in your path is the habit of lack of confidence which is also a very big problem to deal with and which has many branches of negative habits like having too many fears, too many inhibitions, lack of concentration and other such problems which have their root in this bigger problem called lack of confidence. Even though this problem is not as bad as the problem of negative attitude, it is still capable of taking so much away from you and particularly the big things or the biggest things that you are capable of achieving if you don’t have this problem. This is because all the big things in your life will almost always need a great deal of confidence from your side, an undivided faith that you will achieve them which is not there if you lack confidence.

Lack of confidence is a problem of the subconscious mind and though it originates from a series of conscious efforts like most other problems, it finally writes a script on your subconscious mind, which says that you are not fit to do big tasks and you are not fit to achieve great things. As the intensity of this problem increases, sometimes, even small things become difficult to achieve if the individual has very low confidence. In order to know the best possible way to treat this problem, let’s look into the root cause of this problem as the best solution will always come from the root of the problem, because, once we know where the root of a problem lies, it is easier for us to treat it and remove it.

This problem starts when a person is consciously afraid of doing something or dealing with a situation for the first time. As the person chooses to back away, his conscious mind sends a signal to his subconscious mind to the effect that he wants to run away from facing difficult situations. This is not much trouble as only one message has been sent to the subconscious mind. Therefore, there is nothing much to worry about. As this person repeats the same conscious acts again in different situations that he thinks are difficult to deal with, his conscious mind keeps sending more and more signals to his subconscious mind to the effect that he does not want to deal with difficult situations. With repeated messages, a time comes when they take the form of a script written on the subconscious mind. This is where the problems start getting out of hand.

Since the subconscious mind has registered the script of running away from difficult situations, it starts working accordingly. Hence each time you face a situation that may seem difficult, your subconscious mind starts sending fears in the form of inner voices. These inner voices may be like, “Don’t try this task as if you fail you will face great loss” or “Don’t go ahead with this situation, as if you fail, people will laugh at you”. Sometimes, it maybe a stronger message of fear such as, “This is too much for you to handle, so back away!” As a result, you start backing away from more and more situations and this makes your problem even worse as each time you back out, your conscious mind sends another signal to your subconscious mind. Accordingly, your subconscious mind will put up greater resistance, the next time you want to try something big or something reasonable even.

Like most other problems originating from various types of negative energies in your aura, this problem also keep aggravating more and more with the passage of time as you continuously keep backing away from difficult looking situations due to the fears of your mind which come to you in form of inner voices, in most cases. As this problem becomes more and more rooted, you will start observing that you are now finding it difficult to do the jobs which are comparatively easier and which you were able to do only a few years or even a few months ago. This is because, as this problem increases, your subconscious mind starts sending you more and more fears each time you want to try something and accordingly you find it more difficult to face situations, attempt things and deal with people and this is the point when your confidence has hit a real low point.

Since the problem began with a single, conscious act of backing away from a situation, to treat the problem effectively, we will need to start making conscious efforts in the exact opposite direction and change the script written on your subconscious mind. This has to be done with the help of conscious messages sent to your subconscious mind through conscious acts in the opposite direction. At the first level of treating this problem, you need to start with conscious acts of doing and completing small tasks again. Each time you complete such a task, your conscious mind will send a signal to your subconscious mind where this signal will say that you can do it now. As this signal gets stronger and stronger with repetition, your subconscious mind will start sending fewer fears each time you try to do something. Accordingly, you will find it easier to take up more and more challenges and complete them.

Looking at some activities that can help you in treating this problem in the best possible way, start with small acts that are not difficult to do, and at the same time are ones that you don’t do often or have not tried at all. For example, choose an easy-to-play game on a computer or a video game and start playing it. It should be noted that in order to make the most of this activity, you should start engaging in such acts on your own in the first step. Avoid the involvement of other people. This is why I suggested a computer game or a video game instead of playing a physical game with someone else as in such a case, your fears of losing to a person again and again and being embarrassed again and again will be much stronger in comparison to when you are playing alone and no one is there to know whether you win or lose.

Another thing that you should note is that you should always play the game that you find easiest, even if you have to play all the available games on a computer and find out which is the easiest one for you. Different people are comfortable with different types of activities and accordingly, they have better chances of performing at their best in different activities. This is why you should choose a game that you really like and which seems the easiest to you. As you start completing more and more levels of this game with conscious efforts, your conscious mind starts sending more and more positive messages to your subconscious mind. As your subconscious mind starts receiving more and more messages of success and confidence, it will start sending fewer fears first and finally it will start sending messages of inspiration and strength when the whole script has been replaced with the new script of, ‘you can do it’, which can take a long time and which is far away from this step.

At this first level if you know or find out that computer games, video games or any other types of games are not your cup of tea as you don’t like any types of games to start with, you don’t need to play any games as there are a number of other activities to choose from and these activities can also do the same job for you. These activities include indulging in any one of the physical activities like walking, jogging, running, swimming, going to the gym, cycling, rope skipping, aerobics, yoga or any other such activities. Here again the basic mantra is to choose the one that you feel most comfortable with and then start doing it with increased levels of resistance introduced after regular intervals of time. For example, if you find that you are the most comfortable with running, start with a mile run or even half a mile run without stopping and then move up from there on regular basis like adding half a mile or so, every week or every two weeks.

Apart from physical activities, some other types of activities are also available which can help you achieve the same goal. Such activities may require you to learn a new language, learn and remember complete lyrics of more and more songs, learn and remember more and more poems, learn and practice cooking more and more dishes, learn and remember more and more about places of significance, learn and remember about great people in history of mankind, learn and remember more and more valuable quotes and sayings as well as their meanings, learn and practice new talents like sewing, painting, writing, singing, playing guitar, playing piano and a wide variety of other such activities.

The important thing here is that if you choose to learn something that needs to be remembered or practiced like lyrics of the songs and cooking new dishes, you should not simply learn and disengage as that won’t complete the task. Hence you should keep repeating such practices so that you are consciously doing them again and again and through these repeated conscious efforts, you are able to send more and more signals to your subconscious mind where these signals will say, “I can do it and I can do it again and again”.

The reason I gave priority to video games, computer games or any other types of games is that they will require maximum conscious effort from your mind. Since this problem is of the mind, engaging in more and more practices that require more effort from your mind than from your body, will do this job in far less time. In addition to this, games come with a number of benefits. There is no doubt that playing games requires conscious mental effort and will increase your concentration as concentration is the first thing you need to play these games. Next advantage is that games are relatively easy though effective, when compared to physical activities like running or cycling which require much physical activity and accordingly you may not like them much.

Apart from this, playing games is one activity that you can do for hours and hours whereas you can engage in many other activities like running or cycling, or learning to cook new dishes, only for a relatively small period of time every day. And above all these things, playing such games will sharpen your mental abilities day by day as these games require most of the effort from your end, in form of mental effort and as we already know, the more you practice with any part of your body or your mind, the stronger it becomes.

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To be Continued

Lord Shiva Bless You

Himanshu Shangari