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Imagine you have a valid legal complaint against someone and you want to send him legal summons through court. The court is convinced that your complaint is valid and hence the summons is issued. Now imagine you don’t have a valid legal complaint against someone but you still want to send him legal summons and you go the court for the same purpose. The court finds your complaint invalid and hence it dismisses your complaint, without issuing summons against this party. This is what may happen in case you try to send undue negative energy to someone.
Let’s go even further and suppose that you go to the same court again and again; you file the same invalid complaint each time and you make the same request each time. As this keeps happening, the court may issue you a warning not to waste its time and if it still keeps happening; the court may even impose a fine on you. Hence if you keep pressurizing any system to do something that you want but which is wrong according to the system, you may end up facing problems instead of getting what you want.
Coming back to the example, you may never be satisfied with the settlement though even you may think you are. It means even if your ego is satisfied by the way the other person has apologized or paid compensation; this satisfaction is temporary and the enmity for this person is permanent, though it is a subconscious type of enmity. If you want to know how to check whether this enmity still exists or not inside you, even when a couple of months have passed after this incident; here is how to do it.
Simply try to remember this incident and this is what you may observe. The details of this incident may be very clear in your mind and the part where you tried to dominate the other person and the part where the other person apologized may be the clearest ones. In fact, you may remember these parts like they just happened or even like they’re happening at this moment. This is a strong sign that you’ve still not forgotten this incident; and the war between you and that person, the war which you finally win is still going on inside you.
Another thing is that whenever this person comes to the scene, you may be able to observe negativity for him and the quantum of this negativity depends on the quantum of your ego. Isn’t it strange that though the other person has apologized, he’s paid compensation and you’ve even won the war against him; you still fill with negativity when you think about him? This is the strongest evidence that this person is still your enemy and this is why you may not get rid of him, almost throughout your life. Though you may seem to forget him after some years, this forgetfulness may be happening only on the level of conscious mind and your subconscious mind has a perfect record of this incident, till the time of your death or even beyond that.
You see how much trouble can your ego cause for you as it can carry negativity from an average type of event; to the end of your life and even to your next life? This is why the first thing you need to do is to get rid of ego or reduce it as much as possible. In deepest sense; the phrase ‘hell within’ used in the title of this book means ‘ego within’; whereas the phrase ‘heaven within’ used in the same title means ‘conscience within’. Hence your conscience creates heaven all around you whereas your ego creates hell all around you. It should be noted that only you create such heaven or hell and no one else is doing so, as both these entities are inside you and not outside.
Coming to the last case, suppose you’re a conscience driven person and you face the same situation. You may park your car on the roadside, you may ask the other person to do the same and you may then try to handle this situation. It should be noted that your approach in this case is to settle this matter in a friendly way as well as at earliest, and you have no intentions of complicating this matter.
As the other person says sorry and he offers compensation, you may accept them gladly and you may settle this matter in a friendly way. The difference between an emotion driven person and a conscience driven person is that the former puts great value to a heartfelt apology whereas the latter doesn’t care for it at all. It means even if you feel that the word sorry said by him doesn’t carry much feeling and it is shallow, it doesn’t matter to you and you may accept it as a heartfelt sorry.
The difference between an intellect driven person and a conscience driven person is that the former is focused on damages and the compensation for those damages whereas the latter is focused on solving this matter in a friendly way. Hence even if he’s offered a compensation which is somewhat less than the damages, according to him; he may accept it without any arguments. The intellectual person on the other hand may not accept it and he may insist that the damage is more than the compensation. He may not want the compensation to be more than the damages but he may also not be willing to settle for less, even if it is 10% less according to him.
However, in case of a person driven by conscience, he may not care much about small details related to intellect, like the amount of compensation seems 90% of the estimated damages; and he may gladly accept it. He may also not care much about details related to heart, like the word sorry should be heartfelt; and he may easily settle for a shallow apology.
Some people may find this behavior partly strange, but this is the best type of behavior and it may bring the best type of results in the long run. The way you look at this entire incident in this case is that a problem has occurred, the solution is being offered and that’s all. For a person driven by conscience, the maximum he may ask for is the solution to his problem and if he receives it even without asking for it like in this case, this is more than what he may wish for.
Your signature move in this case is that the use of personal pronouns will be the minimum, compared to all three cases. An intellectual as well as an emotional person may use these words around average whereas an egoistic person may use such pronouns more than average and that too with emphasis on them. However, a conscience driven person avoids using personal pronouns as much as he can as these pronouns create boundaries between people. A person with high conscience doesn’t create boundaries and hence he may not use these words.
Hence you may use sentences like, ‘your car has hit my car’ which means that the collision between the two cars doesn’t mean the collision between two people. Just because his car has hit your car doesn’t mean he’s your enemy and it is purely accidental. A big difference between a person driven by ego and a person drive by conscience is that the former considers everyone his enemy until proved otherwise whereas the latter considers everyone his friend, until proved otherwise.
Accordingly, it is very difficult for you to consider this person your enemy and you may even have friendly vibes for him. This is why the use of personal pronouns is limited and implemented in a way that they don’t convey the message of enmity and they instead convey the message of friendship. As the conscience grows more, the sentence may subconsciously change to, ‘my car has been hit’. At this stage, the cause as well as the medium has been eliminated altogether, and you’re only talking about the effect. It means you don’t bother about who hit your car and you only see that your car has been hit.
The first sentence has the word ‘your car’ which conveys that the other person should not feel much guilt as his car has hit your car and he has not hit you, which means he’s not done it on purpose or he’s not your enemy. Hence the other person may feel relaxed because he’s not been blamed and the blame has been shifted to his car, though deep down he knows that the car was being driven by him and hence the blame once again comes to him. However, this is a mild form of complaint and it may not hurt much.
In the second sentence, the cause as well as the medium of this problem has been eliminated altogether. This is because when you have high conscience, you believe that there is no point in discussing the cause or medium of what has already happened and you should focus on the effect, if you must. You understand that digging deep into the cause may not provide any benefits and on the contrary, it may cause problems or it may waste time. Hence you avoid mentioning the cause as well as the medium and you only focus on the effect. The other person may feel even more relaxed as you have not mentioned him in any way, though he knows it’s his mistake. The other person is the cause of problem in this case and his car is the medium.
This is what happens as your conscience grows; you don’t hold grudges against people for their actions. It means if a person makes a mistake, the mistake and the person are two different entities and they’re not one. Hence one mistake doesn’t mean someone’s entire personality and so the person should not be judged from one mistake. Just because something bad happened and you were the cause behind this bad, doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. In fact, a person with high conscience may not even consider you a cause and he may rather consider you a medium.
It means in this case, you may think that your car has been hit and the other person as well as his car is a medium and nothing else. We’ll discuss this topic in details, later on. To summarize, you may not hold this incident against this person and you may be friendly towards him, throughout this incident. It should be noted again that you may not try to do any of this and all of it may happen naturally; because these actions are being carried out by your subconscious mind, based on your exact personality type.
Let’s assume another situation in this case and let’s suppose someone has hit your car with his car and he has run away. Hence you’re left with your damaged car with no one to pay for compensation or even to apologize. Let’s see what you may do in this situation, if you’re controlled by these four entities, taking one at a time.
If you’re an intellectual type, the first thing you may do is to focus your attention on the plates of the car which is running away after hitting your car and you may note the number of this car. This is your natural reaction as you’re an intellectual type. You may then assess the damage. If the damage is not much and let’s say it is so, you may avoid calling the police as you understand that the time wasted in the entire follow up act may cost you more than the cost of repairs.
Hence you may choose to drive away from the situation instead of calling the police. On the way, you may keep thinking about the damage as well as how stupid that person may be, though your focus may be more on the quantum of financial loss as well as on the plan to get your car repaired.
If you’re an emotional type, you may not be able to pay attention to the plates of the running car as you’re an emotional type. It should be noted that the first response in a sudden situation may almost always be the response according to your personality type, which means the response according to your nature; and only the responses coming after that may be deliberate. Since noting the number of the running car is the natural act of an intellectual type, it may not come to you at once; and by the time it may come to you, there may be no car in your vision.
You may assess the damage and let’s suppose it is not much. You may not think of calling the cops as this is something you may not be comfortable with. It should be noted that the emotional type of people usually try to deal with matters on their own or with the help of their dear ones and they generally do not believe in complex and big systems for help, as these systems are created by the intellectual type. This doesn’t mean they may not approach such systems, it only means that they may avoid them as long as possible.
This is a major reason due to which women across the globe suffer so much in different ways, but they often choose not to go to the law. Most women are heart dominated and hence they like to settle their issue directly or let them remain unsettled. Intellectual people on the other hand, are the ones who make full use of these systems and they tend to use law and other such systems a lot. These people only believe in settling their accounts. Whether they do so on their own or a system does that; doesn’t matter to them. This is why they may use police and law to their advantage, much more than the emotional people.
Hence you may choose to drive home and this is what you may think on your way home. If you’re not much attached to this car, you may not think much about the damages or anything else for that matter. In this case, you may not even think about repairs, you may go home and you may not get your car repaired for a significant period of time. As you’re an emotional person, you’ll care for your car only if you’re attached to it and not otherwise. So whether it is repaired in a day or in a month may not matter much to you.
An intellectual type on the other hand may get his car repaired at the earliest as he may think that delaying the repair may increase the damage and hence the car should be repaired in time. You see, how every action or even every thought of yours is controlled by your personality type; and that too without your conscious knowledge in most cases : )
In case you’re attached to this car, you may feel sad while driving away from the scene and you may start thinking about the repairs. Unlike an intellectual person, you may not think about the money required for repairs and you may rather think whether or not your car will look the same again, after repairs. It means the focus of the intellectual person is on the amount spent for repairs whereas the focus of an emotional person is on the well being of his car.
You’re likely to get your car repaired at the earliest in this case as you’re attached to it and in fact, you may first go to a car repair shop before going home. Even when it comes to talk to the mechanic, the intellectual person may concentrate more on the cost and he may try to get a smart deal. On the other hand, the emotional person may not primarily focus on bargaining and he may rather seek an assurance from the mechanic that his car will look the same again.
Coming to the next possibility, if you’re an ego type, this is what you may do when someone runs away after hitting your car. It should be noted that ego uses heart or intellect in order to get things done and it doesn’t operate on its own. Hence there are two possibilities in this case; you may be an intellectual ego type or you may be an emotional ego type. It means your basic type may be one of intellectual or emotional type, with added corruption from your ego.
If you’re an intellectual ego type, you may certainly note the number of the running car and whether the damage is big or small, a police complaint is very likely to follow. This is because in your opinion, someone has attacked you and he’s run away without giving you a chance to reply. Once again, it’s not about the car and it’s about you verses him. Hence you have to show him what happens when someone chooses to mess up with you. You may spend as much time as needed to ensure that the culprit is brought before you, by the police.
Hence you may engage in effort and you may spend time, which may be much more in quantum, than the result you achieve, which means an apology and a small financial compensation in the end, as your car may have received minor damage. Being an intellectual ego type, you may find ways to claim more compensation than the quantum of loss and you may even succeed in doing so. You may remember this victory for long and you may tell this incident to other people from time to time, in order to feed your ego.
If you’re an emotional ego type, this is the most difficult type for this situation as well as for all other situations of this type. You may choose to chase this car and if you succeed in catching this car, a physical fight or a strong emotional drama is compulsory. Things may go to any extent in this case and this is why it is the most difficult type because putting your life or someone else’s life in danger for a small damage is not a worthy act for any human being. Majority of acts of impulsive violence which result in injuries or deaths over small issues are carried out by emotional ego type of people.
If you’re not able to catch this car despite your best effort but you’re able to note its number during the chase, a police complaint is what may come next. You may spend all the time and effort it takes to catch this guy and you may even offer money to policemen for this job, if the system of your country allows such things. You may even forge an injury in this case in order to make it an even bigger offence as personal injury can increase the quantum of this offence. As already mentioned, this is the most difficult type and you may do anything to settle your score with this guy. Remember the phrase, ‘hell has no fury like a woman scorned?’ It has been used for emotional ego type women as they can go to any extent in order to take revenge.
Coming back, you may finally succeed and the police may catch this guy. You may abuse him if you have that luxury, you may take out all your anger on him, you may refuse to accept the compensation and all you may be interested in is an apology, or to be precise; a written apology, if you find out that criminal case may not trouble this person much as the offence may not be high in quantum. If the offence is high or significant in quantum or you manipulate things to increase the quantum of this offence, the only thing you may be interested in is a police case so that this guy may be sent to prison.
However, if the matter is to be settled through apology, you may insist on written apology and you may even get it. In fact, you’ve done so much so far, only in order to obtain this document, though you may not know it consciously. It is not a simple document of apology for you, it is the proof of your victory as well as that of your enemy’s defeat in a battle which you fought sincerely and for a long period of time. As a result, this apology document is going to stay with you for many years of your life, or even till the end of your life; and you may show it to other people from time to time; like a champion shows his trophy : )
If you’re the conscience type, this is what you may do in this situation. You may assess the damage and you may drive away from the scene, with neither much anger for that person nor many worries about the damages. You’re the only type who is capable of smiling on his way home. This is because you may try to learn something from this incident also. For instance, you may reach the conclusion that anything may happen to you at any time in your life and hence there’s no point in feeling so proud or engaging in bad karmas to gain advantages.
You may think that this accident may even have caused you injuries and you may thank god for limiting this accident to a small quantum of damage to your car. You may also think about the person who hit your car and you may smile at the fact that he chose to run away for nothing. This means you know that even if he had stopped, you would have let him go without any trouble. The strange shades of human personality and the big claims made by people in many spheres can make you smile, as no one knows what may happen next moment but everyone still tries to control his entire life and some of them try to control other people’s lives too. It means a car or something else may come from anywhere as well as at any moment and it may kill you. So what is the point in thinking so big about you?
Coming back to the example where your conscience stops you from eating a lot of food, it may do so in a friendly manner and it may also ensure that your heart is also compensated in one way or the other, instead of ignoring it. This is another difference between what your ego and conscience may do in this situation. For instance, this matter is finished for your ego as soon as you choose not to eat more, though it may not be finished for your heart. It means your heart may keep crying for more of this food item but your ego may not care at all and it may remain unaffected.
On the contrary, your conscience will mark the request of your heart as important and it’ll ensure your heart that due attention will be paid to it, at a relevant time. At this time, it is only an assurance and nothing else, but your heart knows that your conscience never makes false promises and hence it’ll feel happy to have this assurance. Your ego on the other hand is very good at making promises to your body, heart or even to your intellect, in order to get done through them, what it wants, though it may almost never keep those promises. The ego is exceptionally good at creating illusions in order to get what it wants, as the ego itself is nothing but a big illusion.
In fact, the biggest illusion in this world is your ego and when it is said that the world is nothing but illusion, in the deepest sense it means that as long as you see it through your ego, it’s an illusion. In reality, there is no illusion in the world and the reason you find it illusionary is that the eyes you’re using to see this world are not the eyes of your conscience and they’re the eyes of your ego. The eyes of your heart and intellect can also cast illusions though they’re relatively smaller illusions. Imagine looking at a wall which has pure white color on it. Suppose you use four options to do so and you wear black glass, green glasses, red glasses and then no glasses.
Accordingly, you may see this wall in different colors, depending on the color of your glasses. Black glasses represent your ego and hence you’ll tend to add black to each and everything you see. It means you may find everything and everyone as your enemy and you’re only likely to find darkness in the end because your eyes are capable of seeing everything in black only. Though this wall is white, it may certainly look black or blackish to you, the opposite of what it is. This is why it is the worst type of illusion as you’re seeing something which is the opposite of reality.
The green glasses represent your heart as green is the color of life and your heart tries to find life in each and everything around it. Though this wall which means the world is white, you’ll see it as green. This may give you some advantage at the early stages because you may see things as beautiful as they are not in reality; which means you may assign much more value to people and things, than they actually deserve. As you can understand, it may cause problems later on when you find out that the actual value of these people and things is far less than what you assessed.
This is why emotional people may feel very happy at the beginning of each relationship or venture but they may end up suffering in the end, in many cases. Remember, the wall is white and the green color is being imposed by you only, which means the illusion is being created by you and not by the wall. Hence the world has no illusion and these illusions are created by you only. This is why the title of this book says, ‘Heaven and Hell Within’ as your heaven and hell depend only on the fact, which glasses you are using and not on the outside world, which is merely a vision and nothing else.
Red is the color of ambitions as well as that of aggression and this is why it perfectly suits your intellect. Your intellect is the one which wants to see material development and in order to do so, it keeps breaking things into smaller pieces. For example, it is the intellect which is responsible for reaching the atom and electrons, by breaking an element into smaller and smaller units. Since it wants to achieve more, it is ambitious and since it breaks things down in order to do so; it is aggressive because breaking anything is an act of aggression.
Your heart on the other hand believes in joining people or things instead of breaking them as it enjoys the concept of a number of people or things becoming one. This is why human relationships work better when handled by the heart compared to when handled by the intellect as the former strengthens them by uniting people whereas the latter spoils them as it tries to break them down into pieces. It means that instead of enjoying the company of people, it starts analyzing their personalities more and more so that it may be aware about each and every shade of their personalities.
This can make such people uncomfortable as no one wants other people to dig deep into him or her and this also keeps you away from enjoying these relationships because you’re busy investigating all the time. Hence you’re seeing this wall as red whereas it is white in reality and this is what creates illusion once again. The world in reality is not illusionary and you’re trying to impose your illusions on it, just like you’re imposing red color on this wall. In the end, this wall or so to say this world may refuse to be painted in your color as they want to have their own colors; and that is when you may call this world illusionary.
The moment your glasses come off, the scene changes and you call it illusion. This is because you’re accustomed to see this wall as red and it has suddenly turned white. Hence this wall becomes illusionary for you as it keeps changing its color though in reality; it was your decision to impose your red color on it and the wall was always white.
There are two ways you can call something illusionary. The first way is that you see something as it is and it then changes quickly as well as significantly, defying all the rules. Hence it becomes illusionary. In this case, this thing is to blame as it is casting this illusion and you’re doing nothing from your end to create this illusion. This is how you may think the world behaves as you don’t do anything to change it but it changes in ways which are not good for you.
The second way of something being illusionary is that the thing is behaving in the same manner from the start till the end, but you impose your expectations or wishes on it and hence you see it differently at different stages. Hence you call this thing illusionary as it keeps changing without obeying a fixed rule. For instance, if you look at this white wall through all these glasses one by one and then without any glasses in the end, you may find it defying the rules and hence you may call it illusionary. This is because it keeps changing colors on its own even when no one is putting these colors on it. Since a wall is not supposed to change its color on its own, it defies the rule and hence it becomes illusionary according to you.
However in reality, the wall has never changed its color and it is the same white wall from the beginning till the end. The only thing that is happening here is your ignorance to this fact or to this rule that in order to see the true color of this wall, you should not wear colored glasses as the color of those glasses will be temporarily imposed on the color of this wall. However, as soon as the glasses go off, the wall becomes white again, which means it becomes illusionary for you.
Coming to the conclusion, in the first case, things are not what they appear to you and they change on their own. Since there’s no effort from your side, these things are to blame. This is the first type of illusion where you’re innocent and the whole world is to blame. The second type of illusion is that things never change in reality and your perception of them or the way you look at them or assess them at different stages is the only thing that changes. The end result is once again the same as things keep looking different to you at different stages and hence it creates illusions.
However in this case, things are innocent and only you’re responsible for such illusions. Though most of us think that they are trapped in the first type of illusion; almost all of us are trapped in the second type of illusion in reality; the one created by us and us alone. Going even deeper, the first type of illusion is there only in order to draw a relative comparison and it doesn’t exist in reality, at all. Hence there are no chances that anyone of us may fall into this type of illusion. That leaves the second type of illusion only, and this is the type we all fall for. We’ll discuss this topic in details later on, but I’ll still mention an example related to this concept.
Suppose you’re an emotional type of female which means you’re wearing green glasses. You like a guy and you fall in love with him. The guy is great and everything looks perfect in the beginning. It all then starts changing and in a year or so, the guy becomes the opposite of what he was at the beginning. The relationship dissolves and you genuinely think that this guy is illusionary as he changed to the opposite type in a year or so. This may be true according to you; but in reality, this may only be your version of truth and nothing else.
While falling in love with this guy, you saw everything in green which means you only looked for the positive things and you never paid attention to the negative things which were always present from the beginning. Being an emotional person, you either chose to ignore them or you even painted those negative things in green, which means you considered them positive things. Considering one such thing, you’re having a conversation with this guy at an early stage of this relationship, say your first or second date; and during the course of conversation; he tells you that he’s had ten broken relationships in the last eight years. He may then tell you that he thinks none of those girls was the one he was looking for and hence he saw no future in those relationships.